Oct. 18th, 2010 03:53 pm
sugar: (Default)
I just got offered a job! Way better pay and better benefits, so it's a total no-brainer. Plus, I have a feeling it'll be easier than what I do now, which is so often frustratingly vague. I'm gonna go from working all by myself to working in a cubicle hive, so that's a bit scary. And probably no more slacking and reading fic at work, which is a daunting thing. Still, it's not like my downtime here is oh so productive - I actually have been far less creative here with all this free time than I was when I worked 11 hour days at Blockbuster without having the chance to sit down. So, this downtime I have so much of here? Meaningless, really.

Anyway, I'd be insane not to take it!
sugar: (clackety  clack)
I'm writing a novel-length fic for NaNoWriMo! I decided it might be a good idea to participate in some way, the better to stomp this awful block I've been wrestling with since last November's epic fail, but I knew that 50,000 original words was not the way to go right now, after a year of cluelessness.

So I spent all weekend thinking up a list of hilariously bad ideas (omg so bad), and finally hit on one that didn't make me roll my eyes five minutes into planning it! Yay! In fact, I started typing out a few thoughts and before I knew it, I had 2 single-spaced pages and had followed the basic plotline all the way to the end.


And then I info-dumped all over [livejournal.com profile] donnagirl and [livejournal.com profile] arabella_hope (hey, are you still [personal profile] spice on DW, by the way? Because that makes us too adorable for words, I'm just sayin'...) which is a sure sign of commitment on my part. Or so my track record would indicate. Also a good sign: having two weeks before I'm technically allowed to start isn't frustrating me the way it normally would. I actually am psyched that I get to plan in deeper detail between now and then.

It's got all kinds of themes I love crammed into it, which helps. Like robots! Yay, robots! Not that I'll be spilling much of it here until it's all the way done (actually, if all goes well I'm hoping to post it as a big bang next spring). I just wanted to spew a little bit of my overly earnest excitement at you.

sugar: (scary glow [BtVS])
First of all: Dear Dreamwidth, whyfor do you log me out every time I step away from the computer? I really love being logged into you. I don't know why you feel the need to reject me this way. *giant fake sob*

Second, a ficlet:

I listen to bands that don't even exist yet
Scott Pilgrim, gen, 750 words, originally posted here at The Bechdel Test Comment Ficathon for the prompt "Ramona & Kim, Halloween".

so very very )


I also wrote this one (Buffy season 8, Satsu and Faith) although I'm not that happy with it, so I probably won't be reposting it anywhere.
sugar: (payback's a bitch [KB])
I'm queer. I mostly like girls, but sometimes I like boys, and sometimes I like people who are neither, or both.

Now this is a holiday I can feel good about, as opposed to the incoherent muddle that is Thanksgiving, which we never seem to celebrate anyway.


We're having a comment party at [livejournal.com profile] penny_lane_42's LJ and everyone who likes to write or read about ladies is invited! All fandoms welcome :)


Went to Geek Night at a local revue theatre yesterday. They were showing The Shining with what had to have been an original 1980 print - you should have seen the light damage and wear & tear on this thing. It had entirely forgotten the meaning of the word black. (Unfortunately, it hadn't forgotten the meaning of the N-word, which I'd forgotten was spoken multiple times in one scene. Even though it's being said by a crazed homicidal ghost and could probably be explained away as the character's word choice, not the filmmaker's, there's still something deeply uncomfortable about watching that scene nowadays. Just goes to show you how much the world has changed.)

Anyway, they do trivia contests for prizes on Geek Nights. Which means it's essentially "give Kath some prizes" night when you consider they're asking horror movie questions. I stopped after one prize, because I'm not that much of a dork, but yeah, I think Geek Night will be a thing from now on, if only for the cool prizes.

How do you like my new shower curtain?

It's way better than the flowered one I last used. I have vowed not to warn anyone ahead of time when they come to visit. Muahaha.

So, yeah. If you need someone to out-geek all your horror geeks, call me. Seriously, it's kind of my thing.
sugar: (Default)
First (and foremost!): Happy birthday to [livejournal.com profile] coalitiongirl! I hope it's a good day :)


Well, I have not gotten my wimpy self to do anything yet re: [livejournal.com profile] whedonland. *cowers*

If you've been considering getting into Chew but haven't gotten around to it yet, this month might be a good time to catch up with the first 14 issues! Because next month's issue will be finishing off the third arc, and it'll have extra pages and a fancy tri-fold poster cover, and you'll totally want that, right? Besides, where else can you get your monthly fix of cannibalism and gay cyborgs? May I direct you once again to my (only slightly out-of-date) introductory post? :D

Oh, and on the subject of awesome things:

Awww, local boys make good and play human Pong! ♥

heigh ho.

Oct. 4th, 2010 11:01 am
sugar: (it's snowtime [Fargo])
Ugh. I have an icky throat almost-sick thing going on today, and the backs of my thighs are killing me from ripping up turf all day Saturday. Being doubled over for hours: I don't recommend it. Also, there were worms that bite and are unkillable!

Stupid hot tub. What good are you if Future!me hasn't time traveled back to say hi and offer Present!me a trip to next month and a nice relaxing soak?

I really will just keep making that same joke over and over. Sorry!

In other bad comedy news, my dad and I had this conversation yesterday:

Dad: "Aw, man, I meant to mow the lawn this weekend, but now I won't have the time."
Me: "You know if you think about it in terms of averages, we did mow the lawn. I mean, we mowed half the lawn a whole lot, and the rest not at all."
Dad: *stare*

Well, I thought it was funny, but maybe only because I was severely exhausted from ripping up a huge patch of turf with my bare hands.

Sometime this week, I have to message someone at [livejournal.com profile] whedonland and see what my status is there. I am thinking "shunned" is a good guess. I'm also thinking, "But I kept posting to you long after I stopped posting anywhere else!" isn't going to make a good counter-argument to the shunning. It's been months, and I totally defaulted on the giftgiving thing, and I don't even know if I got a gift myself (crap, did I get a gift? I'm scared to look.) I really need to make it up to... someone. Anyone? Everyone? Is there such a thing as landcomm community service? /o\

Oh, and: Otis sends in an elevator expert to tell us all what to do if we are stuck in an elevator with the devil. Thank goodness they got an expert's advice on this pressing issue!
sugar: (barney's watching you [HIMYM])
Is it just me, or is How I Met Your Mother suddenly back in major gear this season? It seems like they realized they were floundering aimlessly and decided to get their shit together again. Sort of like the way LOST recovered from Bai Ling et al in its last couple of seasons. I am hopeful! And wondering if they have an end-date set. Is that why they're suddenly so much better at telling stories that don't suck?

And is everyone watching the brilliant Raising Hope? Two episodes in and it's already among my top five shows to watch this season. Oh, and bonus: my longstanding crush on Martha Plimpton is finally getting out for some exercise! Which is great, because I just saw her a couple of weeks ago in an AWFUL, AWFUL movie at the Toronto film festival, so the crush was in danger of being torpedoed by association. Anyway, the show is awesome; I never stop laughing.

(I wish the baby had gotten to keep the name Princess Beyonce, though!)

Which brings me to: I went to the film festival for my birthday and it was pretty damn cool! )

Oh, also, Eli Roth was totes stalking me. I almost mowed him over twice while leaving theatres because he was hanging around outside the exit on a collision course with me. And there was much quiet squeeing while walking away.
sugar: (inappropriate starches [DH])
As promised (or threatened) to [livejournal.com profile] donnagirl and [livejournal.com profile] arabella_hope, this is going to be a Big Emo Post of Doom (tm). It may be that in title only - I'm not sure, I haven't written it yet, but here goes:

I have been soooo absent. Up until August, I was reading but not posting. I felt mute (for various reasons, a large one of which I will confess in this post). Gradually, I even stopped reading my flist, which is something I had never done, ever, in the eight years I'd had my journal. And I *missed* it! I missed you guys so much! I missed posting, I missed having a blog, I missed comments (omg I missed commenting SO MUCH). But I just couldn't bring myself to check my flist. I was... going through some shit.

When I was in the second grade, I had this best friend. She now works in my building and I do printing for her on a regular basis. She's never acknowledged that she knows me, or that we ever watched Spaceballs on Betamax a million times in her hippie dad's shag-carpeted basement swing den. I'm pretty sure this is because we had a sort of violent bff break-up. I don't remember what caused the break-up, but I do remember that the last thing she did in the friendship was accuse me of being emotionally stunted. I couldn't argue - I knew even then that it was true.

My issue with this journal basically boils down to embarrassment. A lot of it is completely irrational. I've felt embarrassed about what I like, what I don't like, who I know, what I do, what I don't do, what I have done, who I am, how I feel. It's this really generalized, crippling embarrassment. It might even border on shame - it's that powerful, and I'm able to direct it at virtually any area of my life. Apparently, I am nothing if not a master of self-sabotage.

Or at least, I have been. Welcome to my plan to snap the fuck out of it by discussing the very subjects that make me most avoidy, regardless of whether you know about them already. Actually, more power to me if you know about them already - do you know how many times I've just let my friends come to quiet conclusions about me instead of using my words? That is not cool. Even if the conclusions were right, that is just not rock and roll. And one of my more minor embarrassment issues is that I hate telling people things they already know, so if you already knew all of this, then I can consider it killing two birds with one stone. More homegrown therapy for me!

So here's my biggest stumbling block, laid bare for you.

The history of my heart, cut to save your sanity. )

The most important thing is not to be mute anymore. I feel like this silence started during those months at the start of last year, when I lost my actual voice. It's like I got a taste of erasure, and it fit with how insignificant I felt inside, so when I got my voice back, I didn't use it. I just kept shutting up, literally and figuratively. Now I'm at this messy spilling point, just the natural end to a year or more of relative silence, I suppose. And I am so ready to yell.
sugar: (death row gigolo [KITH])
Hi! I'm not dead. I've actually been here the whole time. Well, not every minute of every day, but I haven't skipped over anything, so far as I know. Just not very talkative for the last... month. And a half.


Obviously, I have a backlog of post topics that I should probably get to. Such as:

- Bluesfest. The numbers are in - it's officially the biggest music festival in the world! Over 400,000 people went! And you still probably didn't hear anything about it, so I'll tell ya.

- So You Think You Can Dance, which is somehow full of extra fail and extra win at the same time this season. I have such hatred and glee, both.

- My continuing struggle with writer's block, which will make my [livejournal.com profile] whedonland Heart of Gold assignment freakin' difficult. How do you write funny Dollhouse fic? Anyone? Funny and Dollhouse just don't fit together in my brain.

And that's about all I can think of for the day. I saw people doing this Go to google and type "you know you're from [your state] when... and bold the ones that apply." meme, and I tried googling Gatineau (just one sad Facebook group about kids doing crack), Quebec (even fewer results) and Ottawa (most entries either incomprehensible to me or demeaning to Gatineau, where I actually live), so instead, I give you:

You know you're from Toronto when (an ode to Kath's One True Hometown) )
sugar: (darling mermaid darlings [PD])
I have this up on the forum, but I know I should also store somewhere more "mine", so here it is:

BPAL wishlist )
sugar: (death row gigolo [KITH])
You guys, I am so stupidly sick at work. I don't even know how I managed to get here, although I definitely remember there were cold sweats involved. Sorry, commuter buddies. Ew.

Actually, everyone at my house is sick, and a giant drama queen. Yesterday my father decided that this felt WORSE THAN CANCER. Yes, he actually declared it like that. And considering he's a cancer survivor and I'm not, I don't really have any rebuttals for him, other than playing him a YouTube clip of Really??? with Seth and Amy over and over. But come on, a little perspective, please?

Meanwhile, I am dying. OK, not really. But I probably would have called in sick if I'd known the big job I was expecting at noon had been poached by another office! Bastards! Now I'm sitting here bored when I could be home having an Arrested Development marathon (I have never once watched that show while healthy) in my brand new red bedroom! OMG SO PRETTY.

Oh yeah, that's why I haven't been around much: we're in the middle of having the house painted right now, and so there's been a lot of unplugging and shuffling and lugging and reorganizing. It's my first time hiring a company to do it, and they sent one person. Her name is Vanessa, and she is painting OUR ENTIRE HOUSE. She's really good at it, and she's very nice, but I am still finding it quite odd. They had one guy come in for a few hours to do the ceilings, but apart from that, this one person has been painting quite steadily for a week now. She even came in on Saturday. My mom tried to feed her lunch.

Anyway, we've now got some nice sandy beige in our hallways and common spaces, and a silvery purple colour in the bathroom, and a seriously looks-like-it-was-born-there beautiful neutral pink on my parents' walls, and when I get home tonight, probably a yellow kitchen. And my room is a colour they call Rodeo red. I wanted something really rich and saturated because I've got a lot of paintings and prints that I love and want to accentuate. It got done yesterday and I LOVE it, but I was also too out of it to move any of my stuff back into the room last night, so I've been sleeping in there with just my blank, unadorned furniture crowded around my bed like an audience for going on 4 days now. It's been weird.

On a related note, sometime this weekend I had a dream that in order to stay asleep, I had to think all my thoughts in alphabetical order. Hm.
sugar: (dramatic chipmunk Jensen)
Let's just admit it. We've all been waiting with our little paws clasped for the inevitable Stephanie Ware-Ackles Crazycakes World Tour 2010 to hit the internet ever since Jensen and Danneel tied the knot. And it's been nearly three weeks! I was starting to give up hope. My pouty lip was starting to stick out.

Then her "daughter", a miss Bianca Ware-Padalecki, showed up and gave us 2 crazy wanks for the price of one.

I know, I know it's not nice to make fun of insane people. So I won't, I will just quote them a little:

seriously how on earth can somebody become jealous of that ugly unattractive bad teeth person,seriously Danneel Harris and Genevieve Cortese,i have a question for you.

I bet if Jared Padalecki and I weren’t married to eachother(but sad for you,we really are married in real life to eachother,since september 13,2008),he’d go find himself a woman who looks 100 million times better than your ugly tired out messed up sea urchin looking ass,you faggot ass mona lisa looking bitch.

OK, I'm laughing too hard to keep cutting-and-pasting.
sugar: (bare bones)
So, I have never, ever done a friends cut before. Actually, it's quite obvious from the huge tangled mess that is my LJ friends edit page (oh god, the dead comms and purged or duplicate LJs). This cut was motivated by a couple of things.

The first is that I suppose Dreamwidth's subscribe/give access to distinction has led me to feel differently about those people who have friended me silently and who I've friended back out of some blanket "if your journal has content, I'll mutually friend you" policy. Very few of these people have I ever interacted with. I am certain they're very nice people, but as far as mutual access goes, it's not strictly necessary, is it? I'm not going to be locking much of anything that (I assume) interests them about my journal anytime soon.

I am also cutting some people who aren't strangers. Some of these are people I've known in person, some are people I've interacted with a great deal online at one time. Either we've drifted miles apart from each other without keeping any sort of a dialogue open, in which case I must say that I did enjoy our friendship, and I look forward to the reunion, if we ever have one, but that obviously we aren't cut out for day-to-day correspondence, and that's okay. You know where to find me if you need to. Or else all of our interaction revolved around one specific subject, to which I am unlikely to further contribute. Basically, I'm concerned that politeness and the prolific use of filtering is keeping me on your flist far beyond the expiration date of your interest in me. If you feel your interest in my journal goes beyond whatever main interest we once shared, then let me know, and I'll happily refriend. But if not, I'm happy with that, too.

Essentially, I've been feeling far too self-conscious about this journal for far too long. I've been feeling stuck, like walking against a current. I am not sure what led to it, but it's been hindering my online and creative life in lots of ways. Moving to Dreamwidth helped. I do believe that this, also, will help.
sugar: (sam weir [F&G])
- I'm seeing Eddie Izzard tonight! I last saw him 2 or 3 years ago in Montreal, and he was awesome then (he stopped the show to catch a falling piece of confetti and make the world's tiniest paper airplane out of it!), but the crowd was kinda -__-. Montreal's that way, though, and I am expecting Ottawa to be awake for this shit tonight! Yay, I am psyched!

- This bag is waiting for me at home right now. Estimated delivery time of Monday, MY ASS! \o/ \o/ \o/

- These two tweets by Tom Lenk completely made my day yesterday. :D

- In spite of my continued writing confidence struggle and the various other things I'm working on, I fully intend on starting my LGBTfest fic this weekend. I chose a prompt that could apply to any fandom and then, for some reason, decided to use it for Freaks and Geeks. I was going to say I'd never written in anything like that fandom before, but that's not true, I have written Apatow-fic for Yuletide. Anyway, I am pretty excited about it :)

- I may be doing some flist maintenance this weekend. I have never really done a friends cut before. I was never much a fan of people who announce them. But I have some (very) longtime acquaintances I *never* interact with anymore. Most of the time I doubt they're even reading me, and yet their presence on the flist renders me pathologically self-conscious. Especially when it comes to personal change, which is, oh, kind of necessary. So, we'll see. (We'll always have Facebook and Twitter.)
sugar: (delicious ham [LOST])
1. [livejournal.com profile] zelda_zee wrote a fantastic coda to the final episode: Being Jacob, gen, 750 words. ♥

2. I can ask this without spoiler-cutting, I think, but the comments will definitely be off-limits to spoilerphobes:

Friends, how do we feel about Charlie with regards to the finale the entire last season?

3. It's Tuesday, and my icon is making me sad. DAMN YOU, BEN. I don't even like ham. *sobs* Can Tuesday be Coq au Vin day from now on?
sugar: (delicious ham [LOST])
I don't know how much I'm going to say about the LOST finale in this post. I have a lot to say, I think, but I've been leaving it in comments on other people's journals all day and I'm a little bit tired, now. I should have done it here first!

LOST brought me here to fandom and left me here to find my way, and I am ever so grateful that it did, and that I did. I met so many wonderful people through the show and the fandom around it, and I'm still friends with a surprising lot of them, despite mostly having moved away from it, fandom-wise, and have fond memories of lots of others. It gave me one of the best friends I've ever had in [livejournal.com profile] arabella_hope (happy birthday, babe!! ♥) and it got me writing things I was actually interested in, which four years of fiction workshops weren't able to do. Even if the things I was interested in were strange and unusual by most sane people's standards.

So, yes, LOST. It's over! And how many of us now believe Darlton's claim that they've always known how it would end? Let me know how you feel about this, because I'm really interested in what everyone thinks.

LOST: The End - just a few thoughts and highlights )
sugar: (Default)
Reply to this post, and I will tell you my favorite icon of yours. Then post this to your own journal using your own favorite icon.
sugar: (fire sale [AD])
It's my parents' 32nd wedding anniversary today, and as usual, I have no idea what to get them. They never make any noise about it, so some years I don't even notice the date has passed until weeks later. I guess as the only child, it should fall to me to make a big deal out of it. Oh, well, maybe next year. You know, when their union is AS OLD AS JESUS and I am thirty, oh god...

Anyway, presents for pairs are so far beyond me. Couples massage? Two Snuggies sewn together? Matching hats?

What do you guys buy for couple-events?
sugar: (machete [GH])
Great post by [livejournal.com profile] scribblinlenore about the fanfic fiasco: Get over yourself. You are not Story. In fact, you're just one of six billion storytellers who are alive on the planet right now. The fact that you write your stories down, and get paid for them, and maybe you're even exceptionally good at storytelling—none of that gives you some special ownership over something that's as old as humanity and as necessary as breathing.


A rec: Luck Be A Lady (With a Motherfucking Gun) by [profile] lady_krysis, Deathproof zombie apocalypse fic. Not even a stretch, because Planet Terror totally happens in the same part of the world, like, one week after Deathproof :)


Even just taking your ficlet prompts (five prompt spots left, by the way, in case you felt like a free ficlet!) helped me get my ass in gear. Now I've got a decent beginning for my way overdue charity story (as opposed to the 4 horrid beginnings that got scrapped) and I've started up an intentionally cheesy never-to-be-posted fic just for my own enjoyment. And the prompts I've gotten are just the right combo of cool and insane. I'm excited to use words again. In sentences and everything. :)


Survivor's doing a whole Wicker Man thing right now. It's kinda disturbing.


sugar: (Default)

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